The Daily Devotion: The Masks We Wear

Each of us, as some point in time, wears a mask that serves to distort our true character. How can one best characterize the masks we wear and why we wear them? Essentially, we humans adopt masks for the same base reason: Fear.

From deep within our unconscious, we allow fear to drive our actions like an automaton. We fear losing our jobs, we fear not being able to support our loved ones, we fear isolation, we fear becoming obsolete, we fear being vulnerable, we fear being perceived as weak or pitiful, we fear death (or the death of another), and we even fear life.

Marianne Williamson says, "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us." She continues by encouraging us not to shrink "so that other people won't feel insecure" in our presence. She encourages that we shine our brightest. No dimming necessary!

Sadly, though, I've observed how that very sentiment can be grossly deformed by being misinterpreted as permission to prop up our ego through selfish and fearful incantations. In practice, we put on our specially-tailored masks as an escape from fear - often at the expense of authentic connection with others.

Earlier tonight I attended an orientation into the Executive Leadership Doctoral program at the University of Houston. I've had the privilege to work as a graduate research assistant in this fledgling and innovative program both during my masters degree and now as a doctoral student. Experiencing this transition into a higher level of academia has fully unveiled a clear realization. That is, some pursue higher and higher levels of academia - or any prestigious endeavor for that matter - because they are innately insecure.

Let me be clear that I believe we all our own valid insecurities. However, the measure of a man's virtue, strength and sincerity is his ability to present himself in an authentic manner regardless of those insecurities. My main reason for only referencing masculine prose is because I'm specifically referencing someone that I respect greatly for his natural ability to shed his own masks. Someone who's authenticity has always impressed and astounded me.

My doctoral mentor and UH supervisor, Dr. Busch, has always modeled how to communicate authentically and treat others with kindness and compassion. That's why his students respect him as they do.

Here's a quick mental exercise: If someone offered you a suitcase filled with $100 bills simply to treat them well and actually listen to their trivial concerns, how present would you be? Pretty damn present I'm guessing. I like this analogy because that's how feel each time I speak with Dr. Busch. He has vouched for me, given me references, offered up engaging conversation, and helped me time and time again, even though I had nothing to offer in return.

We've all had "conversations" with people who were constantly peering over our shoulder for someone with more influence. Those who inspire me most, however, are those whose actions remain consistent and authentic regardless of who they interact with. Those like Dr. Busch.